Monday, January 29, 2007

Jack, please help America!

We're at a time in this country's history when we need a leader. The Iraqi War escapade, the stagnant economy, the War on Terror, rising health care costs, etc. etc. Our President has been reduced to nothing more than a lame duck figurehead. His polling numbers are reaching Nixon levels. Both sides of our government talk in nothing but apocalyptic terms---and yet, nothing seems to get done. What do you think JFK, FDR, Ronald Reagan, Ike, George Washington, Abe Lincoln, and Millard Fillmore have to say about the state of this country? JFK and FDR have been replaced by Nancy Pelosi and John Kerry. And, lets be honest---what do you think Teddy Roosevelt would say of George Bush or Tom DeLay and his ilk?

There comes a time in every man's life, when he must answer the call of his destiny. I believe that this is the time for a man of the highest integrity step forward and answer his. Now, you may think those hopes lie on the shoulders of Barack Obama or Sam Brownback...but you would be mistaken. I am talking about none other than Marion's own: Mayor Jack Kellogg.

Now, before you think that is impossible---how many of you thought Bill Clinton had a snowball chance in hell during the '92 election?

Think about it...has there ever been a terrorist attack on Marion's sacred soil? No. Mayor Jack Kellogg has warded off Al Qaida by always being we don't have to. He's overseen great economic expansion since he's taken over. I mean, compare Route 95 now to Route 95 ten years ago. Jack Kellogg made that happen. That mural downtown? Jack Kellogg probably painted it by hand with his eyes closed. That overpass that takes you over the most scenic view of a garbage dump this side of the Mississippi? Jack Kellogg made that happen.

Not to mention, the Press absolutely loves this guy. When was the last time you saw anything negative about Mayor Jack in the news? Never. He's a humble man who fears God. My one wish is that Mayor Jack could've sat in on the Constitutional Congress. I can only imagine the wise words he would've bestowed on the mental midgets like Ben Franklin. Hell, we probably would've never had slavery or the Vietnam war.

Now, I have yet to hear a national talking head pick up on what a dark horse stalks the stables here in Marion County. I think, we as Marionites, owe it to the American populace to make sure Mayor Jack Kellogg throws his hat in the ring. We've already bestowed Warren Harding, regarded by many as the Greatest President ever, on the American people. It's time we give America Marion's next prodigy. We've shared Mayor Jack for too long. Like releasing a fawn back into the wild, it's time Jack answers his nation's call. I hope to cast my vote to make Jack Kellogg the next leader of the free world come 2008. God bless.